Do you want to be THE best or YOUR best?
Many people have an immediate, almost knee jerk response to this question.
My response? “THE” best for most of my career. Whether that was at work or a sport, I was known as a consummate competitor in anything I put my mind to. But this came at a cost, which I will get to later in this post. Now my response is immediate, that I am not focused on “The” best. Don’t get me wrong; I want to be a professional who is highly skilled, knowledgeable, self-aware and a leader who serves others. However, I want it built in a mindful way that is in line with who I am versus my previous path, which was based on things outside of me.
So give this question some additional thought: Do you want to be your best or someone else’s version of best?
Now hold that answer as we dive into some additional questions to ponder.
What are you really trying to do in your career? Be honest with yourself. Are you possibly working so hard that you don’t know what it is you are actually striving for?
Have you ever hit your goal, but felt immediately afterwards, that you wanted something more (the next promotion, the next sale, the next win)? Instead of the ease and peace of this success, This immediate desire to conquer the next thing is typically a result of trying to be the best. How fulfilling was it to hit that goal?
The focus was outward.
The focus was on someone else’s best.
When you focus on being the best, it is a massive sacrifice – many aspects of life and personal happiness can be pushed aside – in fact, loneliness can happen. The radical approach is hard on the self and others around us. When you focus on being the best, this means that you compete with those around you. This doesn’t create a culture that will lift others; rather, it pushes them aside. It can create distrust very quickly. It isn’t easy to succeed when you don’t work with others. Whether you are aware of it or not, when you choose to be the best, you are telling others that you want to better than them.
There is a sustainable way: have a determined focus on your inner growth. When done this way, you are focusing on being your best. This way, when the award comes, it doesn’t matter – you can say that this was nice, but you can stay grounded and see that you are still on your path. You can appreciate your diligence in the process while being aligned with exactly what matters most to you.
As for me, I find that my greatest enjoyment and success come from being honest and authentic to who I am, to what matters to me. Not what the world thinks I should do. It’s a life long process for me, but I can see how this has helped me meet people, connect more deeply with others, build businesses and lead others. There is an ease in this approach.
The process is rewarding in itself.
It’s important to consciously choose how you want to be. It involves self-awareness – knowing whether you want to ride, run, walk or sit still at any given time – will go a long way for you and your contentment.
Knowing how you want to be, not just what you want to be is essential.
I realized a number of years ago how I want to be with myself and others. There is less of a focus on the outward appearance of being the best. It’s much more comfortable than looking for outside acceptance and accolades from others.
Try being your best.
Work away at yourself, your skills, and being the best version of yourself that you can give others. The rest will take care of itself. Appreciate the success that shows you that you have done an excellent job, which aligns with what you want to be.
Be your best. Not someone else’s best.